This humble correspondent has fled the M&S coop, and is sojourning his way around the world, gaining tans, friends and infections along the way. In lieu of a wordy and slightly too long account of my travels, here is a small gallery of some of the more amusing things I have seen so far.

Click here to see them.

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I know it was on The Age website, but really, Stephen Fry is quite funny, and so is humping, especially when it involves a rare parrot and a man’s neck.

See it here now.

Light a candle, lay out a towel and enjoy our favourite songs from 2009. The perfect soundtrack for long train rides across the subcontinent.

For your pleasure at:
http://www.mediafire.com/file/znjjw2ez1gv/BHN2009.mp3

Look here

It was hot, and I decided to utilise the presents my fellow and I gave to each other for Christmas to spruce up our kitchen. He got an ice-cream machine, I got a Kitchen Aid (potentially the most useful thing I own). So I beat some eggs and sugar in the later, added it to some cream and milk over heat, let it cool, and I put the mixture into the former to spin into a most delightful summery treat. With luck it would soon be dripping down my chin. This is where is all fell down. The delicious creamy mess, which tasted and smelt delicious, permeating the whole house, was curdling right before my very eyes in the above picture. Only, it was hiding under the thick, rich, bubbling surface, and alas I did not know until it was too late. I tried pushing the lumps through a sieve, twice, but there was no way to undo the damage.

So, lesson learnt, and my advice to you dear reader is this. When you spend $30 on ingredients, make sure you don’t fling your sugar covered recipe aside like the pro you know you’re not. Read the instructions carefully, go over them a few times, and when is says “stir constantly” make sure you are not doing the dishes at this point.

Alternatively, think of the loss as a cheap cooking class in ice-creamery, and look on the bright side, all that cream and sugar is down the sink, not round your mid-section.

I think I might make sorbet next time.